For every horcrux, there is a stage of grief.

It's been one week since you looked at me...
Just kidding, that's a song. 

It's been 3 days since Harry Potter premiered slash my life ended, and I'm still recovering.  I've eaten nothing but junk food, I shower irregularly, and I think I've only stepped out of this house once.  I was wondering why I was showing behavior akin to a teenage girl being humped and dumped by her slightly older, douchebag boyfriend, and then it dawned on me: I literally just did.  (Not literally, of course.  What I just did was use a metaphor.)  I did, however, just end the longest relationship of my life, and I'm showing signs of grief.  After much research (i.e google), I discovered that there are 7 stages of grief, ONE FOR EACH HORCRUX!  I haven't gone through all the stages, but the signs are certainly there.

1. Shock - "Someone put THAT much effort into making a costume?"  "She doesn't even look like Helena Ravenclaw!"  "I could literally shit a better Bellatrix costume."
It all started at the premiere really, because by that point I knew the end was coming.  (Spoiler alert: SO DID HARRY!)  I was shocked that so many people had nothing better to do with their time than try to come up with really elaborate costumes that just ended up looking like rubbish.   I think these were all clear signs I clearly took this relationship for granted.

2. Pain and guilt - "I feel bad that I drove four hours to Gainesville to watch this, and ditched my brother and sister." 
Okay, this guilt actually has nothing to do with this, really, but I still feel pretty bad. 

3. Anger and bargaining - I think I may have skipped this stage, because I haven't been angry.  Well, I have been, but for unrelated reasons: my tan is fading, we ran out of doritos, etc.

4. "Depression," reflection, loneliness - Depression is such a strong word, which is probably why they put it in "quotes."  I have done a lot of reflecting, though, and by reflecting I mean I re-read the 7th book. 

The next three stages I have yet to go through:

5. Upward turn
6. Reconstruction and working through
7. Acceptance and hope

Maybe, if I'm really lucky, I'll die and go to heaven (which happens to look a lot like King's Cross Station) and I'll meet Dumbledore and he'll explain this all to me and I'll see a dead baby but he won't explain that and then I'll metaphorically catch a train and be alive again.  But that's only if I'm lucky.