The other night, I walked into the kitchen to grab myself a midnight snack.1 As I was looking for something to eat, I noticed there were brownies that Jennifer had made. I ignored them, and promptly grabbed a bowl, which I immediately filled with rice and kimchi. It was delicious, but when given a choice between a brownie and Korean food, who thinks to themselves I think I'll go with the rice and pickled cabbage? I'll give you a hint...THIS GUY.2 But it's not my fault; I'm predisposed to make decisions like that. Afterall, I'm Korean.3 Anyway, the moral of this story is YOU KNOW YOU'RE KOREAN WHEN...
- As a child, instead of having normal birthday parties your mom invited all of her friends from church for bible study
- You play the piano/violin/guitar/all of the above
- Circle, cycle, so cool, soccer, sock, school, and sucker all sound the same
- Your mother has had or does have a crazy ajuma perm
- One or both of your parents are Korean4
- You know what the word "HWIGHTING" means
- You've shouted HWIGHTING, and immediately had someone echo it back
- You hate when people mistake kimbap for sushi
If 8/8 of these apply to you, you're probably Korean. Congratulations! Now go celebrate the Korean way by buying yourself some soju (Korean rice wine), getting incredibly drunk at karaoke, almost getting into a fight outside of some bar, and blacking out. Actually, that's a pretty universal way to celebrate things. Do it anyway.
2 I am not a guy.
3 Half-Korean. Half AMURRCAN.
4 This one's a given.
My mother was talking about cutting her hair and getting a perm on the train yesterday. I proceeded to point to the lovely Halmonee sitting opposite us, somewhat senile and peeling garlic, and asked,"Like that one?"
ReplyDeleteShe said she likes straight hair better.